SACRED COWS

It’s not only Hindus who have sacred cows – we all do. But, as I get older (and I hope, wiser) I’m beginning to question the value of some of today’s icons, the cows that are so sacred their contribution to culture cannot be reasonably questioned…apparently.

In my mind this has manifested itself most clearly in my increasingly cynical, indeed, hostile view of some of the great figures of pop and rock.

Now, let me warn you in advance… these conclusions (nay – these wildly opinionated proclamations) may offend many readers, but I have to get them out there, or I’ll burst. Here, for me, are the six worst offenders, so please, those of a nervous disposition…Stop Reading Now!

1. The Rolling Stones. Once great song writers and performers. Now just a very profitable freak show. Their musicianship has become so sloppy I can’t allow my ears to be punished by it.

2. A lot of John Lennon’s solo stuff. Yes, he was a Beatle, yes, some of his solo material is ahem…fab, but Life with the Lions or Two Virgins anyone?

3. The xx. Okay, they won the Mercury Prize this year – a major accolade in the UK, but to me they sound like a very lame Joy Division, thirty-years too late. Can anyone tell me the point?

4. Any New York band of the past five years. Boy, am I tired of all the Talking Heads wannabes, especially as TH are my favourite band in the entire history of the Universe. And, yes… you know who I mean…stand up Vampire Weekend, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah and The Yeah Yeah Yeahs, to name but three.

5. Bob Dylan’s last album Together Through Life. Love His Bobness to death, but not this one.

6. Anything by U2 after Achtung Baby (one of my all-time favourite albums). How could a band go so wrong? Today, they are the supreme self-parodists. Aggghh! No…worse, they’re the new Rolling Stones. Lord help us!